“Whenever there is ‘tension’ in the body, it needs attention.” ~ Dr Gabor Maté
So let’s be clear. I’m not referring to muscle tension here. Well at least not from the perspective you have tension in your body from lifting weights. Tension from overdoing it in the gym or on the track. Nor tension in your lower back from lifting the wheelbarrow incorrectly over the weekend.
Here we are talking about a different type of tension. Emotional tension.
That tension is emotional tension. And emotional tension becomes stored in the body. If not dealt with (worked through, resolved and released), then it can wreak havoc on the body.
Emotional tension can be felt in many areas of the body. Areas include the back, neck, chest, shoulders, the hip region amongst others. Tension is not only felt as a physical tightening but more so like something is holding on, not releasing – not letting go (in fact, the words in bold are the small keys on the tension keyring that aid healing of unwanted tension in the body).
Tension in the body can often feel like a locked muscle. The body can feel stuck, locked, twisted, knotted or held in position. For example; we may have a knot located underneath the scapular or an inability to move the neck from right to left due to a stiff neck. This can feel like we have pulled or strained a muscle. But in fact, it is emotional tension. That emotional tension is stored and remembered in the fascia. The fascia being the webbing that is spread throughout the entire body. Essentially, the fascia is the connective tissue around our organs, bones, muscles, joints, and nerve fibers. The fascia also helps our body to glide and not get stuck and stiff.
#1. Ask Yourself Why Am I Holding Onto Tension
The first step in releasing tension in your body is to ask yourself;
- Where is the tension located in my body?
- Why do I feel tension in this particular area of my body?
- What is it that I’m holding onto?
- Does it restrict me in any way?
- Does it feel warm or cool?
These questions are extremely deep, especially for Men. It takes time sitting and asking yourself such questions. And it takes time to sit and listen to the answers.
Often though, you’ll find that the answer lies in your very first childhood experiences. For example; you may be holding onto the first moment when your Dad went away for work leaving you behind. You believed it to be you yet, your father was simply providing for the family doing the only thing he knew. That is, putting food on the table. Not because he wanted to but because he was doing what he believed and knew was right at the time.
So, ask yourself these questions (above) and more. In doing so you will begin to recognise and release the tension stored in your body.
#2. Begin To Feel Into Your Body
This one is tough. Most of us can’t actually feel our bodies. As babies we naturally feel what we need and when we need it. As we grow up our parents, our upbringing and conditioning, the education system, society, our environment and even medications squash our natural ability to feel.
Knowing how to feel into our body is highly important. It allows us to connect on a much deeper level where we begin to use our intuition, our gut feelings and our entire being to sense each and everything around us.
When it comes to tension, feeling into your body is again the answer to releasing the tension. For wherever there is tension it needs attention.
So, if you are feeling any tension in your body begin to feel into that direct area. The tension that sits in your back. The tension that resides in your neck and shoulders. The knots that are stuck in your hips and so on.
And so. Sit and FEEL into your body. Feel every aspect that you can. Notice the sensations that arise. The comfortability and the discomforts and be with them.
#3. Breathe Into The Space
After you have asked yourself why am I holding onto tension, then begun feeling into it, the third step is to breathe into the space where the tension resides.
Breathe into the space literally means; breathing into the tension.
The best way to achieve breathing into the space is to simply take a long deep breath in (contract) then a long deep breath out (expand). Whilst breathing out, fill the space/area where you feel the most tension. It is not an easy concept to grasp but one that provides liberating benefits.
An easy way to picture it is to imagine a seesaw. As one end goes up the other end goes down. The same theory is applied to breathing into the tension. For example; if I have back pain, I apply my breathwork breathing in (contracting) then breathing out where my breath goes forward (out of my mouth) whilst simultaneously filling my back – breathing in the opposite direction into the space. Another example could be that I have ongoing tension in my shoulder. In this case I would sit for 3-5 minutes and simply breathe into the sore shoulder region of my body. At the same time I would ask myself questions as to why I have ongoing tension in my shoulder. Questions could be; where is this pain coming from? Can we place attention on it? When was the first time I felt tension in my shoulder?
The main secret to breathing into the space is sending the area positive loving energy. You are not breathing into the space in an angry aggressive manner. Rather, you are sending it love and ki (universal energy).
#4. Send It On Its Way
The last, but certainly not least is to simply Let It Go. That is, release the tension from your body. Releasing the tension is allowing it to leave your body and for it to be on its way. The best here is that the body will do this naturally, of its own accord. You don’t have to do anything but send it on its way!
Remember, we are talking about emotional tension that is stored in the body. So, the main aspect here is that it is stemming from an emotion. Usually emotional stress or traumatic experience.
By following the steps one through to four, the tension in your body will over time begin to leave and say its goodbyes.
Here’s a recap of Releasing Tension in Your Body
- Ask Yourself Why Am I Holding Onto Tension (what’s the underlying cause.)
- Begin to Feel into Your Body (be with the comfortability and the discomforts.)
- Breathe Into The Space (purposely breathe into the area of tension.)
Send It On Its Way (say goodbye to the tension and send it on its way.)